Living Life Under 5 Foot

Promise? Every day of my life...  I couldn't stop laughing!  ohhh I will try this My room was supposed to get cleaned... 

New Years always brings  New goals  New ideas and sometimes if we are lucky  New perspectives.  We only accept the Love we THINK we deserve. The thing is, we always deserve more than we think we should. Life can sometimes beat us down, and make us feel like we are less than we really are. However, we are worth so much more. Stop settling. It has been said that a place is only as good as the people there. We can find ways to be happy no matter where we are. Life is too short to surround yourself with people who don't make that place good.  This New Year is a time for change, understanding, accepting, and moving on. The future is unknown and anything can happen. But one thing is certain Tomorrow is another day and anything is possible.  Make it a good one.  xoxo Shay Brought the New Year in with my wonderful friend Jess. She makes it worth being here!

Here is my annual sum up of the year! xoxo Shay January- Started my job at the Children's Theatre, got in a pudding fight, created the robot box, moved into a new apartment in Salt Lake. February- chopped 9 inches off my hair, Bridge to Terabithia was finished and performed, Internship started at Utah Trailer Source. March- Keaton hits his year mark in the mission, Jonny comes home from mission, I meet Judith Rasband April- Emery hits 1!!! Jake hits year mark! School is finished I have a 3.9 GPA, Job starts at the LDS Business college May- I visit home, Quit the Children's Theatre, Katy and I had our first fight, Nate moved to UTAH! June- The accident, my jaw surgery, I visit ABQ, Ben leaves, watched Hot Rod 4 times. July- I watched the entire series of Ugly Betty, Found a new love for Mint Chocolate Chip Brownie, Turned 19, drove the mini cooper August- Worked my tail off (60 hours a week), went to 7 peaks, long boarded down the U of U hill, quit all my jobs...

-Miracles happen - It snows - The sun shines through clouds - I paint walls - Bananas become my favourite fruit - I travel with my dad - I try to sing publicly  - I see my family in Spokane - It's Christmas time - I get excited for New Years - My sister loved her present  - You see smiles on people's faces - There are friendly strangers - Strangers fill up my gas tank and check my oil - My car gets fixed - I get locked out of my house because I forgot the code.. - Healing takes place - Closure is found - Strength to move on shows itself - Happiness is everywhere - My sisters are pregnant - I find out what they are having through FACEBOOK . guh. (Indie.) -Tycy graduates - Indie comes to visit me - I buy a new hockey stick - I see my wonderful friend Mary - I don't become the hulk - or get super powers. It's a sad day  -But once in a while.. the Lords plan starts to make a little sense. Family. Source.

Well,  This week I started my treatment,  Basically they put some radioactive stuff inside of me, and shot gamma rays at me to see where I was bleeding so they could stop it. I'm pretty much going to be the Hulk No big deal. But honestly, it's the weirdest feeling when you sit there and then they inject some stuff into you and WITHIN seconds, the world comes crashing down around you.  Sometimes I wish we could just "inject" the Lord's will into our veins. Where it would take over seamlessly  and we could live our lives just how He wants. Sadly enough, this can't happen because then it takes away this thing called agency.  Strange.

I had to wait a day to figure out how I wanted to verbalize this. 1 year ago 4 people from my small town were killed in a car accident. One of which was my really close friend Renzo. He would always joke around  about us getting married, and things like that. He would live funny notes on my car, always give me a hug when he saw me, and try non stop to make me smile. It worked. Even since his death even the memories make me smile. Here's the thing, the year of firsts is over. Which means the year of new things can happen. Wallowing isn't good. Even though you try to be good and faithful in this life, doesn't mean everything will always be all peachy keen. In fact the more faithful you are the more the adversary tries to cut you down. Here's the thing though. He won't have power over me. This last year has been one of the hardest, most heart breaking, painful, horrible years I have ever had (and that's saying worse then the divorce, worse then the bone...