Saying goodbye to consistency. That's how I felt when a new driver took my 1994 Toyota Camry.
For those of you who have ever sat or had the privilege of driving in my car would attest that this wouldn't be something to even feel remotely sad about. Since she (my car we will call her Rikka) sounded like a dump truck, only unlocked from the passenger door, rattled whenever we sped up, radio didn't work because the antenna was snipped.. and many more funny quirks, it still was a little bitter sweet, and here's why.
I bought my car when I was 17 for only $1,500, she then moved me to Utah with my whole life in her, drove me to school, work, shopping, and back to Canada when my friends were killed, I sat in her when I cried, she listened to me belt out my favourite songs (which isn't pretty because I'm a terrible singer). Anytime I've prepped for a speech, she gets to be the thing to hear it over and over again. She then moved me back to Canada to experience me growing up. Basically, over 5 years, this car (outside of family) has been the most consistent thing in my life.
Sad.. eh? Think about it, is there something like that in your young life? An object? Or maybe a pet?
Anyways,
Here's what I learned.
For those of you who have ever sat or had the privilege of driving in my car would attest that this wouldn't be something to even feel remotely sad about. Since she (my car we will call her Rikka) sounded like a dump truck, only unlocked from the passenger door, rattled whenever we sped up, radio didn't work because the antenna was snipped.. and many more funny quirks, it still was a little bitter sweet, and here's why.
I bought my car when I was 17 for only $1,500, she then moved me to Utah with my whole life in her, drove me to school, work, shopping, and back to Canada when my friends were killed, I sat in her when I cried, she listened to me belt out my favourite songs (which isn't pretty because I'm a terrible singer). Anytime I've prepped for a speech, she gets to be the thing to hear it over and over again. She then moved me back to Canada to experience me growing up. Basically, over 5 years, this car (outside of family) has been the most consistent thing in my life.
Sad.. eh? Think about it, is there something like that in your young life? An object? Or maybe a pet?
Anyways,
Here's what I learned.
1) Change is hard, but change is still good.
No one dislikes change more than my slightly O.C.D. brain, however sometimes a little bump in the road, ripple in the pond, or whatever you want to call it... is good enough to pop us outside out comfort zones that we tend to live in. Change makes us grow, adapt, and look at things differently. In all aspects, no matter how hard it is, it's good or at least for our good. (I'm always reminding myself this)2) Sometimes the right choice seems uncomfortable.
This strange sadness overcame me when Rikka was driven away by someone else, and me, knowing she would never come back. It hit me in my feels in the most strange way. Almost to the point of me reversing the sale. But then I let her drive away, and as I sat in my new car, I knew I had made a good choice. In life when we make right choices, whether it's for ourselves, the person we love, or the greater good, it can be uncomfortable. It will be uncomfortable. You will feel strange, watched, and like everyone's life is focused around you. It's not. You're fine. Stick to your gut.3) There's adjustment periods
In anything it takes time to adjust to change. You can't expect yourself to feel okay with it in minutes. Sometimes I may take days, other times weeks, months or even years. Change; even though it's for the better doesn't mean it's easy in the slightest. When I got into my new car I realized there was certain things I needed to learn about this car. There were new quirks, strange sounds, and it drove differently. Then the next morning when I went to get into my beat up old car, my heart sunk when it wasn't outside my house and I panicked thinking someone stole it... haha yes, I was freaking out for a solid 3 minutes. Give yourself the healing time to adjust.4) It happens when you least expect it.
At no point last week did I go into it thinking I would sell my car. I thought it would be a normal week. However that's not what happened. I looked online and found a good price, on an amazing car, I test drove it. And then by that Friday my Rikka was sold and I bought a new vehicle. Bam. Change happened and I didn't plan for it, I wasn't expecting it, and nor was I prepared in the slightest. It was borderline inconvenient. That's the way life, and change happens. Sometimes we are ready for it, and other times it completely blindsides us. Roll with the punches and trust your feelings. They won't lead you astray.5) You see things you were missing, that you didn't know were missing.
When I started driving my new car I noticed little things that were so nice. For example this new car started quietly, it didn't shake on the free way, I could get to a place without a headache, and many other things. Though this change was a little uncomfortable, and made my life less stable it was for the better, I've become more happy, and driving has been much more enjoyable not only for myself but those around me as well.
To you who are facing changes:
I understand instabilities, I understand fear of the unknown and the discomfort that comes from the way life pans out, accept that change has happened, for there's not anything you can do. Make your mindset aline with how you want your life to be and stop at nothing to make that happen.
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