Skip to main content

This is the Story of a Girl

Behind every strong exterior is something being protected. I tend to think I need to be closed off in order to feel safe, to not experience vulnerability at any point. Lately, I've begun to ponder where this trouble began. You'd think majoring in Psychology I would magically be better at this concept. However I'm not.

I thought... and I thought of past hurts, past breaks, and past everything. Is this what creates me currently?

Or is it reactions to those problems, and if so, how did I decide to react?

OR is it all a subconscious condition response to situations that block certain feelings because of past problems?

If this makes sense to you.. congratulations. 

They say our past doesn't define us, but our choices do. Isn't our past made up of choices? Do people only really focus on certain choices and choose to define because of that. Do they know the whole story? Do we ourselves know the whole story? Or are our emotions higher due to the setbacks? Do things morph and change through time in our brains? Do they expand, shrink, engage, or hurt?

What creates that need to be so hardened that nothing can come near to even perchance hurt us slightly?




Behind every strong, happy person, there's a whole lot, that a whole lot of you can't even begin to imagine. 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Summing it Up Through Songs

As always I like to sum up the year, month by month.. however that post comes the first day of January. Look for it.  Today, I will sum up the biggest part of my 2013 year through music lyrics of songs that I feel have touched me, inspired me, or reminded me.  Enjoy.  I heard the doctor, but what did he say, I knew I was fine about this time yesterday.- Ben Rector, When a Heart Breaks.  If you're lost and alone, or you're sinking like a stone, Carry on. - FUN, Carry On. It's time to defy gravity- Wicked, Defying Gravity  It's the way you do the things you do that make me fall in love with you- Rocket to the Moon, Dakota  It's okay not to be okay, sometimes it's hard to follow your heart. Tears don't mean you're losing, everybody's bruising, just be true to who you are- Jessie J, Who you are. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, what doesn't kill you makes you a fighter- Kelly Clarkson, Stronger You can't carry i...

Your "Thoughts and Prayers" Are Bullshit.

Yes. I said it. I also thoroughly agree with that statement. Here's why. As I've been going through pretty huge and life-changing medical problems, my family has been physically nowhere near me. Granted my intestine decided to swell up in Saskatoon, which isn't convenient for anyone. It's given me so much time to think, in some scary and painful moments. Let me preface this by saying I'm not a religious person,  However from what I know, God, helped those in need, he didn't just pray for the sick,  he visited them, and he served them. Let's imagine that when that blind guy came to he Jesus, Jesus said, "You're in my thoughts and prayers" and then left. That story would have turned out very differently. We all do and say things in our lives almost out of habit. Like think of how many times you've said "Hey how are you?" and not actually listened for the answer. Lots, I know. I do this ALL the time, and I'm working incr...

Smashed Windows

10 days ago I was changing locations on my travels through Utah. I packed up my mini cooper with my workout bag (this included 3 pairs of shoes, headphones, 5 pairs of yoga pants, 3 sports bras, 7 tank tops, my shower stuff, and deodorant) then I loaded up my 2 long boards, one being a Land Yatchz and the other my sector 9, finally I put my  Cannon camera bag, (It had my 7D a 50mm 1.4 lens, and a 35-118 1.8 lens in it. Along with a charger 4 batters, camera strap, and all my business cards). I thought to myself, I'm going to run across the street, grab a coffee then load my final bag into my car and take off to Roy. So that's what I did, however when I returned from across the street to my utter horror my window had been smashed, and everything from my car was gone. After I called the cops, and some friends to come and help I turned into a catatonic mess. I literally stood by my window and stared at my car for hours. Finally I decided I looked like a psychopath and therefore ...